Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
I am sitting here in a quiet house, and the only sound is some chewing from the dogs and their bones. Charlie is at batting practice and I am waiting for American Idol to come on, and I just finished the last book in the Princess Diaries series that I was previewing for work. I loved it, but I'm not so sure what moms at school might think of all the discussion of sex in this one. Hmmm.
So, I am going to take the opportunity to keep this short and relax for a few minutes. I am going to unplug.
Oh, and has anyone seen my iPod Shuffle (she answers to the name of Sophie)? She is missing. I fear she has been kidnapped, but maybe she wandered out there into cyberspace. If you see her, send her home, ok? Thanks.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
But it made me wonder...how long will I blog? I have been at it a little over a year and I like blogging. I do. I like the connectedness to women all over the country and around the world that are interested in the same things as me. I like reading other people's opinions on things and seeing what they are going through.
There are times though, when I feel obligated to this blog and need to find something to write about. There are times when I don't know what to write and I have to come up with something. There are times when I feel like I am boring my readers when I only get two comments.
When will I turn it off? I don't think I will any time soon. While I would love to have more readers, I don't know that I could keep up with a blog like Pioneer Woman if I also had a job. It would have to BE my job. I like my little corner of the internet.
How long do you think you will blog? What drew you to it? What makes you come back day after day to read about other people? I am curious about these things. I wonder. Why are we all here, putting little pieces of our lives out on the internet? Let me know. I would like to learn a little more about you.
And, if you have a chance, stop by and read a few of Brin's recipes. I think you might find something that you might want to cook and eat. Personally, I copied down the recipe for Bacon Wrapped Chicken Tenderloins with Avocado Ranch Dipping Sauce. Yum.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Wouldn't it make you nervous?
I believe that God has a baby out there for us. That He planned for us and already knows will fit right in to our home and family. I trust in that.
I made this booklet, and this is ALL the birthmom has to go on. My 7 pages of photos, captions and a letter from us telling a little bit about ourselves and why we want to adopt. The letter was limited to two pages. TWO pages. While we don't want to overwhelm the moms with all this info, does two pages seem like enough space to convince someone to give you their child? Would you give your child to someone who wrote you a two page letter?
Now, I know the moms trust that the agency has checked us out. Our agency promises the moms that their children will be raised in Christian homes, and everyone goes through the homestudy process, but that little book is all they have to make a decision. She might see four or five booklets, she might see two, depending on what criteria she has for the adoptive parents.
I have to back up and say that prior to this I had really only been thinking about us in this process. About how I couldn't get pregnant. About how long this could take. About how I will deal with the waiting. In the back of my mind I knew that a woman would be giving me her child, but I didn't want to think about it much. It's selfish, I know. But when our agency rep called to tell us she had received our book, we were talking about how much stress this job brings. She is the one who has to sit in the hospital while the mom signs the papers and gives away her rights to the baby.
Could you do that?
Even knowing that the baby will have a good life and that you are doing the right thing, could you ask a woman to sign those papers?
That hit me. Really hard. And I think it was important for me to hear. So I could really understand this sacrifice. And appreciate it even more that I was already.
I am thankful for the agency we chose. They are awesome!! And I know that the counseling they provide helps the birthmoms with their grief and the whole situation. I am thankful that we found them, so thankful. The more I talk with the ladies that work there, the more I realize what a calling it is to work at an adoption agency. Especially one that deals with domestic cases. In an adoption from another country, there is little to no contact with the birthmom, but here in the states it is a whole other ball game. The emotions ride high.
It's a calling. It's a ministry.
SO, to Emily, Kelly and Kelly, at New Life Christian Adoptions, I send whole hearted hugs, thank-yous and prayers for your work. May God bless you for the work you do.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Sunday, March 8, 2009
But I was thinking about it today when I was grocery shopping...do those stores like me too? Are they happy to see me coming? I think so. And here's why. I am a respectful shopper. And maybe this counts as just being a respectful human being in general, but I was really thinking about it in terms of retail. And if YOU'VE ever worked retail, you appreciate the customer that takes an extra moment and helps you out.
Some examples (I know you want some):
- I use the IN door on the way IN, and the OUT door on the way OUT. Now, I am starting you small, but it's simple. I hate it when the traffic is going the opposite way. This is why the doors are labeled, people. This also applies to aisles: it's like traffic. You walk on the right hand side.
- I try to bring in a cart from the outside. Most of you moms already know this trick, since you park near the cart return to put your small children right into a cart. But if you can bring in one from the outside, that's one less that they have to bring inside. Again, I know someone gets paid to do this, and some store have those electronic pusher things, but I inevitably see some small teenage girl trying to push in 45 carts.
- If I pick something up and then later decide I don't want it, I either give it to the cashier or take it back. I do not stick my bananas in with the canned goods, or stick frozen waffles in with the tampons to sit there and defrost. Yes, I KNOW someone will come around and put them back in the right place, but if the waffles have already defrosted, then yuck. That's food wasted. When I worked at Michael's during Christmas, this was always a huge problem, especially since that store carries such small items. We'd find things everywhere and then spend an hour putting it all back. Oh, and in clothing stores, don't even get me started. Why people leave piles and piles of clothes that they tried on in the dressing room, instead of putting them back on the rack marked "returns" is beyond me. It's five extra steps people. I don't have room to put my purse on this shelf in here while I try on a pair of jeans because you were too lazy to put something back. You don't have to take it all the way back to where you picked it up...just to that rack.
- If I break it, spill it, knock it over, or crack it, I let someone know. The employees will want to clean it up now, instead of waiting until seventeen carts have tracked through that grape jelly you spilled. Or that black stain you knocked over. I promise you, they want to get it now.
- If the sign says "have your money ready" then HAVE YOUR MONEY READY. Did you not know you were going through a drive-thru? Come on, I'm in a hurry too! That's why I didn't go inside.
- Yes, cashiers get paid to stand there and take your money, but they always appreciate nice customers. Aren't you glad when you get a nice cashier? The same is true in reverse...they'll be happy they had such a nice customer. And if you are nice, then it's easy to ask if they can bag your bananas separately from your squash.
I know that there are people that get paid to take care of most of this stuff, but in this economy where companies are laying people off, and 10 people are doing the work of 15, I can help out a little. I can. It takes very little time, and it may go unnoticed, but I feel good when I am respectful of other people's time as well. If you've worked in a store, or a restaurant then you know of what I write.
Living our lives thinking of others is an accessible goal. Serving others. I can do these small things.
I can do these small things.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
I painted the canvases a pale green (and I just took the spare wall paint from when they painted the room) and then when I put a second coat on it, I brushed in some darker green to add a little more depth. (and these photos aren't so hot...taken at night with dining room lights...so washed out.)
Then I copied some letters that I took right out of Microsoft Word and drew them on the canvas. Then I erased them. I will share my secret with you: lightly ERASE the pencil marks you make if the paint you are going to be using is a light color. This will save you hours of frustration when the pencil bleeds through the letters.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Did you dream about the perfect husband, with a cute little house, a baby carriage and a dog?
And I didn't.
Sometimes I dreamt that I was this great adventurer, or explorer, or inventor? Or that I would cure some important disease. Or that I would be a famous singer (that sooo didn't happen!) That everyone would know my name and it would be up in lights. My face would be in magazines and I would be interviewed on television. That I would be important.
And I grew up.
And the fear took over.
I took the safe route. The path that had already been cleared of all the big rocks and dangerous cliffs. I let the whisper of fear talk me right out of those adventurous dreams. I took a talent that I had and went with it. I wasn't brave, I wasn't courageous. I found myself a cozy little corner of the world and snuggled myself down into it.
Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not unhappy. I love my husband and my house and my dogs. But I don't always love my job. I live it and I like it, but it isn't my passion. It's a paycheck and one I am grateful to have, but I wish sometimes that I hadn't let the fear keep me away from something bigger. Something more.
But now I want to be brave.
And I am scared.
This isn't really the economy to be brave and step out, so I'm taking baby steps. Teeny-tiny little baby steps that inch me forward.
I want to write. A book. A book that people will read and love. I think I can do it.
And I don't want to be scared to do it. I don't want to hear those whispers that tell me that it won't be good enough. I want to push aside the doubts and let my imagination run away with itself.
Did life always turn out the way you planned? Was there something else out there that you saw and thought "that could be me?" Did the doubt get you too? How did you get through it?
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
The sun was shining and I put on my boots, grabbed my camera and went outside to capture a few moments.