a different perspective

When you turn your head a little bit, sometimes a subject can change completely. Life does that to you sometimes, makes you wonder where the joy even comes from. It turns on a dime. What can be happy for someone can be painful for another. Adoption has many sides. The birthmother makes a sacrifice and we become a family. Two sides. She hurts while we rejoice. Two sides of the same coin, but it's all in how you look at it. Heads or tails. Opposites.

This isn't a flower. It's my reminder that something beautiful can come from something I consider ugly. It's my reminder that while I wait for the joy to come into my life, someone is facing the most difficult decision they might ever make. It's my reminder that you can cut something up and take the pieces and make a masterpiece. His masterpiece.

It's all in how you look at it, right? From my side, it's a waiting game. From her side, it's a lifelong wondering of whether she did the right thing. I do hate the waiting though, and I can confess that to you.

I keep saying that this summer has been full of rest, but what I mean to say is that is has been healing. My broken heart has been knit back together, ready for another try. The quiet has let me begin to dream again. The rest has brought me bits and pieces of peace. When I was in the middle of it, I began to wonder if I could ever get out. Looking back, I wonder why I ever wallowed in it. Yes, this past eight weeks has been healing.

Two sides. One God big enough for both.