Today I have been sucked into a marathon of America's Next Top Model. I admit that I am a huge fan of this show. A closet fan maybe, but now I am out in the open. I love seeing the way they shoot pictures and then seeing the result. I aspire to that greatness with my camera, and as the only person around here to shoot is me, I thought I would show you my various stages throughout the day.
Here I am this morning in my favorite cuddly, black sweater. This is before my shower. My hair usually has a mind of it's own in the morning. In this shot you can also see how green my eyes are. That usually gets hidden behind my glasses. I think this picture also shows that my head hurts. At least, I can see that in the puffiness under my eyes!
Here I am getting out of the shower. Wet hair, pale face, etc. I love a good shower. A good shower can wash away the craziness and pressure of the day. I may look a little intense, but I really did feel a lot better after my shower.
Ok, so I put on some makeup and let my hair dry. Got dressed in a lovely red sweater. I know that I am not a Top Model or anything, but I think the final product is pretty good. I usually feel different once I put my glasses on. Like I have a layer between me and the world. Maybe that is a barrier I put up myself, and I just pretend that my glasses cause it. I feel like my eyes tell alot about who I am and then I have to put this frame over them that keeps people at a distance. People don't really notice my eyes until I take off the glasses. And I hardly ever do that during a normal day.
I know that all women deal with some level of insecurity. I do too. You'll notice that you don't see much of my body, and there are reasons for that. I am comfortable exposing my face to the world, but not my cellulite. But I have come to realize that beauty is not the reason I am loved by my Lord. He sees deeper. He sees past the puffiness, past the glasses, past the barrier I put up for the world and looks at who I really am. He sees that I am striving for something better than where I started. Doesn't that bring you some level of comfort? That God doesn't care about your lipliner or designer clothes? If it comes from Goodwill or Macy's. What He cares about is where I am in my spiritual journey. Where I am coming from when I worship. Who I will be tomorrow, instead of who I was yesterday.
Lord, thank you that there is beauty in this world. Thank you that I can see it in myself and in others. I pray that you will continue to build me up and build up others through this post. Take away my insecurities and replace them with the strength only You can give.
"Queen of the Jews"
1 hour ago