Sunday, February 17, 2008

a day with my camera

Today I have been sucked into a marathon of America's Next Top Model. I admit that I am a huge fan of this show. A closet fan maybe, but now I am out in the open. I love seeing the way they shoot pictures and then seeing the result. I aspire to that greatness with my camera, and as the only person around here to shoot is me, I thought I would show you my various stages throughout the day.

Here I am this morning in my favorite cuddly, black sweater. This is before my shower. My hair usually has a mind of it's own in the morning. In this shot you can also see how green my eyes are. That usually gets hidden behind my glasses. I think this picture also shows that my head hurts. At least, I can see that in the puffiness under my eyes!
Here I am getting out of the shower. Wet hair, pale face, etc. I love a good shower. A good shower can wash away the craziness and pressure of the day. I may look a little intense, but I really did feel a lot better after my shower.

Ok, so I put on some makeup and let my hair dry. Got dressed in a lovely red sweater. I know that I am not a Top Model or anything, but I think the final product is pretty good. I usually feel different once I put my glasses on. Like I have a layer between me and the world. Maybe that is a barrier I put up myself, and I just pretend that my glasses cause it. I feel like my eyes tell alot about who I am and then I have to put this frame over them that keeps people at a distance. People don't really notice my eyes until I take off the glasses. And I hardly ever do that during a normal day.

I know that all women deal with some level of insecurity. I do too. You'll notice that you don't see much of my body, and there are reasons for that. I am comfortable exposing my face to the world, but not my cellulite. But I have come to realize that beauty is not the reason I am loved by my Lord. He sees deeper. He sees past the puffiness, past the glasses, past the barrier I put up for the world and looks at who I really am. He sees that I am striving for something better than where I started. Doesn't that bring you some level of comfort? That God doesn't care about your lipliner or designer clothes? If it comes from Goodwill or Macy's. What He cares about is where I am in my spiritual journey. Where I am coming from when I worship. Who I will be tomorrow, instead of who I was yesterday.

Lord, thank you that there is beauty in this world. Thank you that I can see it in myself and in others. I pray that you will continue to build me up and build up others through this post. Take away my insecurities and replace them with the strength only You can give.


remodelingthislife said...

you are beautiful! and brave! no one wants to see ME before my shower :) thank you for sharing your feelings - we all are insecure at times, it's just part of who we are - but you say here the most perfect reasons for letting that stuff go.

Pea Pod Mommy said...

I ADORE ANTM! I am eagerly awaiting the new season starting in a few weeks!!

Spent time reading your blog. Will come and visit often!

Anonymous said...

you are so much braver than i am!!! i dont even like pics of me after a shower and makeup!! of course i liked the 3 rd shot, but the second one is my favorite. theres just some sort of raw natural sexiness in that one! maybe it was the intensity but it is a top model pic in my opinion!! love it!! (and you of course!) christal

Emily Loria said...

Love ANTM... a little too much. The drama is the best part!

You look smashing in your rosy red sweater!

Ann said...

Beautiful shots, natural,and showered or not you look fabulous and you represent the majority of real women across the world, Beautiful these models maybe, but their photo shoots involve a huge, huge amount of digital manipulation,lighting etc it is amazing what you can do with a computer programme !!! so we have unrealistic image shown to us and it is physically impossible for the majority us to achieve.
But, Sissy you look wonderful, and I say that most sincerely, as I sit here at 6am in a coffee stained robe !! with my bed hair !!
So as the Spice Girls say "GIRL POWER!!"

Sissy said...

Yes, ANTM is a great show! And so addictive! I really like the whole process of seeing the hair, makeup and final photo. It brings out the photographer in me, as you can see.

Yes, the new season is starting soon, but I read that Twiggy has been replaced with Paulina Porzikova. I really liked Twiggy.

Thanks for the encouraging comments about my pics. I had a great day shooting them and picking which ones to post. Don't think me to brave though...I must have deleted about 75 shots that I deemed "too weird" looking.

Heather said...

Okay, you are officially the cutest thing!! And next you're going to tell me your hair is naturally curly. Of course it is.

I just ditched my glasses for contacts and LOVE them, but I totally agree about feeling exposed. Plus I keep pushing on my nose like I'm pushing up my glasses. Habit I guess.

I can't imagine you having to delete any pictures. You are so photogenic! And I'm not just sayin'.

Sniz said...

BTW, did you take the picture that's on your header?

Sissy said...

No, Sniz, I did not take that picture. I wish I had. I keep thinking it would be so nice to sit in that forest and watch the sun. Alas, I got it from GettyImages. A wonderful website...there were so many to choose from. And, for some strange reason, I am in love with trees. I love them in all shapes and sizes and I love December cause I can have a tree in my house that smells amazing! I won't let my husband cut any down in my yard and I cried when he trimmed the lower branches off my magnolia. I actually apologized to the tree!

Oh my...did I just say way too much?

Sniz said...

Of course you can link to my blog! I'm flattered. I love trees too. There's one in the field next to my house that is huge and majestic, even naked and bare in the winter. It's branches have grown is such awesome shapes. I notice it's stark beauty every time I drive past!

Ann said...

They only use the carriage as a special request, normally they use specially long cars, but I totally agree horses are much better for the environment.
I love trees, I am just waiting for some lovely sunsets so I can do some tree shots in silhouette and I cant wait till early spring when the woods near us are full of birch and beech trees and there is a vast carpet of Bluebells it is amazingly stunning and I will for sure be posting a few pics of that on my blog.

Tara Johnson said...

So, I've just started really getting into reading & lurking some blogs and yours happens to be my favorite. And so, I have decided to go back in your history and read more and more, because you really are an amazing woman!! I can relate with you on so many levels - from work to before and after a shower. Anyway, intead of lurking, I thought I would introduce myself and let you know how much I enjoy reading! Thanks for the inspiration