I am addicted to wedding shows. I make this admission easily. I can sit and watch any shows about weddings on Style and WE and sit there all day. Lace and flowers and centerpieces and invitations and cakes and photographers. All so fun to me. I know some brides look back and never want to do it again. I would plan my wedding over and over again. I had such a great time planning all the details. Not to mention that I was planning a prom at the same time, and I was immersed in those details too. I considered being a wedding planner at one time, but I really didn't want to be working weekends when my husband is off.
All this being said, there are some aspects of my wedding that I look back on and wish were different. I wish my dad had been there to walk me down the aisle. I wish my dad could have met my husband. I wish that I could remember more of walking down the aisle and seeing Charlie, but that moment is wrapped up with 400 other moments from that day.
Why ruminate on all this? We all love the romance and spectacle of a wedding, but it is the tougher stuff underneath that makes a wedding. It is the 50 years after it that make a wedding. Weddings are tarnished when the couple divorces a year later. Even if it was a gorgeous day, if the couple splits then the moments are forever tainted with that ugly parting. I used to think love was a fragile thing, but since being married I have realized that Godly parings are made of tougher stuff. Yes, it takes work. It takes so many conversations and moments when we are angry or scared or frustrated and at the end of our rope. But underneath it all is an iron rod that God has sautered together.
Even with all the turmoil that I am personally experiencing in my journey to make a baby, I can rejoice in the fact that God gave me a marriage that is built on a solid rock. My husband is a man with a deep faith and he is what I never knew I needed. While we may never know what will come in the future, I can feel secure that he will always be my home base.
Thank You Lord for all the blessings You have given. Thank you that I am partnered with a man that seeks Your heart. Help me to find rest in the comfort You can provide. Thank you for the security of what You have bestowed upon me.
Most of all, I thank You for the next 50 years.
I am a woman with more questions than answers. I am constantly searching, learning, decorating, loving and muddling my way through this life. I live under His grace. I stray daily from my faith, my diet, the road, but never my husband. I could eat a whole dish of tiramisu and not feel guilty. I could knit a sweater with all the dog hair on my floor, if I swept it up, or knew how to knit. I am hanging on, holding out, and hoping for the best God has to offer.
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6 comments:
If it weren't for the fact that I got married in my mother in law's living room 11 years ago, I would love for you to plan my wedding. I bet it would be beatiful. But, as you may know, I'm not much of a romantic and never ever desired to have a big shindig. Something about being the center of attention just doesn't suit me.
Despite the hurriedness of our nuptuals and the lack of whimsy involved, I wouldn't change a thing. Well, I take that back. I'd change one thing: Craig's mom ordered a cake with whipped cream frosting. Blech! I'm so a buttercream girl. This still haunts me.
And also, I must admit, that I would have loved to have received a Kitchen Aid stand mixer. When you give up the traditional wedding, you give up the gift registry. Sigh!
Oh well, like you said, it's about the next 50 years of love, joy and companionship, not buttercream frosting and the beautiful machine that can whip up that frosting into creamy, buttery, sugary goodness.
Your posts are so beautiful, Sissy. I truly believe that God has given you the heart of a mommy and will give you children to love. Hang in there, sister. Your babies are on their way. OH!! And we have to talk Twilight sometime. You know they're making it into a movie and that they've already cast Bella and Edward, right??
Thank you for your kind comments on my blogg, I can see from your info that you are a librarian....well how's this for a coincidence, I co-own one of the remaining independant Book Stores in the UK we are based 7 miles south of Cambridge, so apart from Photography my other passion is books, please keep checking in its so great to hear from people all over the world,i love your blog you are a very wise woman.
Ann ( in the freezing cold UK)
God Bless
Thanks for all the lovely thoughts. I have a few things to add...
I love whipped cream frosting, Alison, but Charlie hates it.
I have KitchenAid mixer and only use it about 4 times a year. I am not a baker yet.
Heather, who have they cast as Edward and Bella...I must know!
Ann, glad to meet you! I linked up your blog so that others can see your journey this year with your camera. Such great pictures!
Sissy,
I just knew that Charlie was an awesome guy, and now that I know he hates whipped frosting, there is just no denying it. He's a keeper!
Craig hates buttercream. It's a fierce battle, but we can agree on cream cheese frosting.
Although, we never have cake laying around the house, so I guess it doesn't really matter.
Home base...I love that.
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